I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
