And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Randomize