No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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