would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
