the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
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