Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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