She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
