You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
