apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize