Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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