wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
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It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
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looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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