So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
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He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
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Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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