I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Randomize
