dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
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I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
he quoted the bible to break up with me
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
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I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Come share oat with me in your robe
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
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