What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
