There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
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just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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