Whoa Z and x make the same sound
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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