I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Pants are for mortals
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
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