never play flip cup with pint glasses
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Randomize
