Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
