please come you make the beer taste better
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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