What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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