I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize