just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
