a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
