I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
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My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
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it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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