i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize
