why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
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