we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
