So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize