So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.