ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
