ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
