I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
What did we do last night that was yellow?
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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