Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
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