Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
