Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
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I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
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So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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