I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
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Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
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hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
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