garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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