Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
