i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
