I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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