Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after