I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Quick, to the slutcave!
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Randomize
