Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize
