May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
