yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
