I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
