It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
