I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
