May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize